senashenta | Entries tagged with diet

I guess with being so worried about the 'lotls the last couple of days I haven't been sleeping much, which sucks but also I finished writing and editing Snapshot so at least that came out of it. It came in at 37 pages and 17,329 words all together.

Now I'm going to edit Ghost In The Machine. This Thursday coming up I'm going to post Snapshot, though, which defers Ghost In The Machine by a week which means I still have plenty of time. I still need to edit Pinfeathers and Teeth, too, before I post them on their designated weeks, and then... I REALLY need to work on the next fics in the series if I want to keep up with my update schedule. Like whoa. :|

I'm just starting to get back into the groove with my writing now that Dr. K has upped my dosage of ADHD meds. It's been like two weeks, I was expecting it to happen faster but idk. Maybe with my system already acclimatized to the lower dosage, it's taking longer for the higher dosage to take effect? Is that a thing that can happen? I have no idea. Or maybe this dosage just isn't strong enough for me and I need an even higher one. Dr. K told me that if that happens again I can just call the office and tell the receptionist I need a new prescription for a higher dosage, but I feel like she didn't mean AFTER ONLY TWO WEEKS, you know? So, I guess I'll stick it out a while longer.

Speaking of Dr. K, last time I was in I mentioned to her (in the course of conversation) that a couple of years ago I switched from regular Coke to Coke Zero, and she was AGAINST IT. Apparently the artificial sweetners in sodas like that mess up your guy biome AND your brain biome. She literally told me she would rather I was drinking full-on Coke than the diet or Coke Zero. So, this month I bought real Coke and I just used up the last of my Coke Zero yesterday. I guess I'm officially back on real Coke. Now we'll just see how much weight I gain on it. I mean I only drink a can a day (sometimes two), but still. That's why I switched in the first place. Not that it really matters, my weight is already totally out of control, so I mean... what's a can of Coke a day? Sigh.

.....

Last night Dad called to check on me and see how the situation with Mom was and I lied to him and told him it was better, because if I didn't he was going to call her and that would have ended badly for everyone involved, but probably especially me. So, I just told him things weren't as bad and we were getting along again when in reality, like 50% of the time she's yelling at me for something I've done or said, or was about to say, or even just something she ASSUMED I WAS GOING TO SAY. I can't seem to do anything right and that includes THINKING which like, figure THAT one out. She seems to have decided she's psychic lately, and it's insufferable. I just spend all the time I can in my room and avoid conversations with her unless absolutely necessary. Walking on eggshells, walking on eggshells.

I think it would hurt less if Mom and I hadn't been so close before, before she decided that everything I said and most of what I did was intolerable. I wish we could just TALK IT OUT but every time I try to start a conversation she gets angry immediately and that makes ME cry (because that's my reaction to stress; I have no control over it) and then SHE starts YELLING because me crying pisses her off now, for some reason, even though she's known me my whole life and KNOWS I have no control over it.

I so desperately want out of this house and into a place of my own, buy I'm stuck here until the subsidized housing people come through or someone in one of the one-bedroom apartments in the co-co moves out or DIES, whatever comes first. Dad says if he had the room he would move me down there to live with him, but we tried that once before and I had a total mental breakdown as a result. I just. I don't CO-HABITATE well with other people. I have a lot of eccentricities and habits that people find annoying and frustrating and it all just makes them come to hate me in the end. I'm not an easily lovable person and I know that.

Maybe if I get some books published people will see me differently, I don't know...

Anyway.

I'm thinking of rehoming my betta fish, Delta. I only got him because Jaskier died and I didn't want to keep a little tank strictly for Lute. But when I brought Delta home, I just didn't form the attachment to him that I did to Jaskier so now he's become a chore to take care of, and that's not fair to him. Maybe I can find him a better home on kijiji or FB Marketplace or something. Although I don't think you can list animals on FB anymore...

I have days when I consider rehoming the budgies, too. When they're being loud or I'm cleaning up their incessant mess and I just think ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. But I DO have an attachment to my birbs, at the end of the day despite the noise and the mess I would be sad to see them go, so I haven't acted on those urges yet. I just get really tired of the feathers behind EVERYWHERE, I guess, especially from the girls. =/

AXOLOTL UPDATE: Kaida and Haku are BOTH out and exploring the new tank now, so I think in the end they'll be okay. Still worried about Ryuu, though, he remains scrunched up in one of the hides shunning the world. I think he was hit the hardest by whatever the fuck happened with the water, though, so it's not a huge surprise. I'm just hoping he pulls through.

Current Mood: blah
Current Music: N/A

I'm getting sick. Or, well, SICKER. I'm always sick. But I woke up this morning with my sinuses blocked up and a bit of a sore throat that's going up into my ears, which is never a good sign. I have a tickle in my chest, too, so there's something going on there as well. I'm not really bad yet but give it a day or two and I'll be a mess. I knew it was coming, though, because I've been craving mushroom soup like WHOA, and I only really crave soup when I'm getting sick. Blegh. Not looking forward to the next week.

Anyway.

So, I complained and magically all my Temu orders were shipped out like three to four hours later, including the ones with preordered items in them, which I wasn't expecting. Assuming everything arrives on time, I'm happy with the customer service on Temu so far. Also I now have like... TWELVE orders in various stages of on the way to me, which is ridiculous and frankly kind of bad. I need to stop going on Temu, especially since I have to take the cats to the vet in February (Juna) and March (Pluto.) And the last three or four orders don't even have anything for other people for Christmas in them, they're strictly orders for myself, which... yeah. I have no self control.

I do, however, have Mom and my little brother sorted for Christmas via Temu (as well as Mom's birthday this year) and some stuff coming in for Dad that will complete his gifts as well, and something for Lee, though I still need to find more for him later on. So that's good, I guess. But it doesn't make up for my blatant overspending, that's for sure. :|

I also bought a copy of the movie Daddy's Little Girl on DVD from ebay yesterday. It's basically torture porn, which I'm usually not into (except for the Saw series), but for some reason this one is weirdly compelling, even though it makes me cringe sometimes. I think because the torture is so creative and not stuff I've seen in other movies, if that makes sense? I dunno, I just wanted it for my collection. I watched it on Tubi a few months back, and then again last night because they miraculously still have it. I'm considering picking up American Mary at some point, too, which isn't torture porn, but is like... graphic, twisted medical stuff. I've watched it a couple of times now, too, and the more I watch it the more I like it. But I guess we'll see.

Yesterday Trunks was supposed to be coming over to do laundry and for Mom to take him out and do groceries, but he cancelled at the last minute because he had to go to the ER for a TMI medical problem. He's fine, just uncomfortable, and he's supposed to be coming over today instead (I think.) I'm foisting off a bunch of sugary cereals on him, since I shouldn't have them anymore (because I can't have anything that tastes good anymore), and I asked him to bring one of his SPN USB drives from Christmas over because I have something to add to it (Supernatural The Anime Season 1 + Extras.) Not sure if he'll remember, but I've reminded him twice, now, so hopefully?

When the stupid external filter (with the surface skimmer that I desperately need) overflowed and flooded my room (there are still damp spots on the carpet gdi), it got water into the dresser, too, so I've spent the last few days doing a SHIT TON of laundry and then leaving the drawers open to finish drying properly. I have piles of laundry all over my room atm. But in DOING all that laundry I've found a bunch of clothes that no longer fit me, and I really have no chance in hell of EVER getting back into them, even if I DO manage to lose some of this PCOS/NAFLD weight. I'll never be as skinny as I was ten years ago. So, a couple of (small) bags of clothes are going to Valu Village some time soon-ish, including some pieces that I absolutely love and hate to part with. This whole medical weight thing really sucks. :(

For the last few months, Mom had been sleeping like 20 hours a day and I've commented on it a couple of times, and finally asked her to please talk to Dr. K about it next time she's in because I'm really getting concerned, but she says she's just bored. Apparently when she gets bored she gets sleepy, which I don't personally understand, but okay. I'm like... so do stuff. All she does is sit on the couch all day watching TV. If you're BORED read from your kindle, or do a puzzle, or whatever... I know she would rather be OUTSIDE doing things, but she can't exactly garden right now, but that doesn't mean there's nothing to do INSIDE. I'm sorry that Lee insists on watching the same three shows over and over and over again, but like, you have to be proactive, too. Maybe I should teach her how to make candles or jewelry or something, I dunno.

Only 18 days until I get to see Dr. K and can ask her about upping my ADHD meds, as well as SO MANY questions about NAFLD and PCOS, and why the fuck they can't check PCOS without an internal vaginal ultrasound NOW, when I was diagnosed with the condition via a REGULAR ultrasound 20 years ago?? I also need to talk to her about my CRIPPLING BACK PAIN whenever I lift something or twist the wrong way (hint: pretty much ever way is the wrong way) or bend over or do basically anything. I need muscle relaxants or painkillers or SOMETHING so help with the situation because the scoliosis is REAL.

I have a bunch of buttons I want to make for The Walking Dead, quotes and stuff, but I need to download the proper sized template from Vograce so I can do them, and I have to get my Etsy store back up and running now that the postal strike is over. Soon I'll have a bunch more Wiggly Foxes to post, not that the ones I already have posted are selling or anything. I need to take more pics of them, though, because now Etsy's algorithm doesn't even show listings in searches if they have less than two pictures, which is stupid.

Honestly, my entire Etsy journey so far has been frustrating... I know my stuff is good, and worth what I'm asking for it, and would do GREAT at a con or actual market, but on Etsy it all just sits and collects dust. It's frustrating and disheartening because I put a lot of effort into the pieces that I put up for sale. I think buttons might sell better, though, I just have to get off my duff and post them. =/

Current Mood: blah
Current Music: N/A

The day before yesterday (Sunday?) I finally went at and did a full, deep clean of the axolotl tank and a complete water change at the same time. I'm telling you, axolotls are worse than FISH, trying to catch them to get them in the bucket. They just go ZOOM everywhere, and kick up all the gunk in the tank in the process so you can't even see them. It was an adventure capturing them all, that's for sure.

But once Kaida, Haku and Ryuu were out of the aquarium, I set to siphoning out all the water and scrubbing it clean, then scrubbing all the hides and stuff and rinsing off the plants, cleaning the filters. It was a long and arduous process, but the 'lotls were safe in their bucket with an air stone to make sure they had oxygen. The worst part was hauling all the water, both emptying the tank and refilling it later. It put my back out, as well as my wrists, knees and hips. I woke up in AGONY the next day.

When I put my little 'lotls back into their tank, they all immediately dove for cover, which wasn't exactly a surprise, and I basically didn't see them at all for the rest of that night. Kaida is still hiding now, and that was two days ago. But while I was fixing up their tank and making is sparkly clean, I added a new hide that I bought around 10 days ago for just this occasion and it turns out they LOVE IT. Haku and Ryuu do, anyway. I don't think Kaida's been in it yet.

Anyway. Adventures with axolotls, yep. :D

Yesterday I ordered the rest of the movies that I had on my Christmas List and didn't get (I only got one, Saw X, from Amy and Brit, I should have known they'd get me that one lol), so I've got Inside Out 2, The Watchers, Godzilla x Kong: A New Empire, Lisa Frankenstein and Imaginary coming in over the next little while, and I also ordered Don't Breathe 2 because while going through my movies I realized I didn't have it. :D;;

On top of that I ordered a book on Edible Wild Plants, a compass and two sets of tights (one summer and one winter) for my Bug-Out Bag. BECAUSE PREPPING. I also ordered some picture frames which have absolutely nothing to do with prepping, I just wanted them for some photos I have and couldn't find cheap 4x4 frames around town. :P

I just bought two wigs for Wren (because she changes her hair so often) and a shirt and skirt/corset set for her as well. I'm still trying to figure out Wren's style. She's like Sexy Librarian Chic when she's at work and then when she's at home or out and about she's all long flowy skirts and corsets, shirts with bell sleeves. She's complicated. Wears black a lot. And purple. Dyes her hair on the regular, all kinds of different colors. So I bought her a white-and-red wig, and a purple-and-white wig. And I already have a black-and-pink wig for her here. So.

This month I have three extra government payments coming in: GST, OTB and CCR. It's a decent chunk of change all together but I'm going to put all of those payments onto my credit card because I've been using it quite a bit lately. Same thing with the extra government payments coming up in the spring. Trying to be responsible, here, for the first time in my life, I guess.

On Friday Mom and I are going out (a little late) for our monthly meal out together. Friday is my birthday, too, so I requested that we go someplace nice so I guess we're going to Swiss Chalet because Mom has coupons. It's like. It's my freaking BIRTHDAY, can't we go to a steakhouse or something? Not that I could CHEW a steak considering my tooth situation at the moment but it's the principle of the thing. Still, I agreed to it because I'm tired of being yelled at for everything I say and I just... it's fine. It's my birthday, but it's fine. Coupon meal on my birthday. That's fine.

I need to finish my postcards in the next day or so, so that I can mail them in the next few days. I've really procrastinated over them this month. I guess it felt pointless at first because of the postal strike and then I just... didn't want to. It's still the same as before, I started the postcard thing with Poe and I'm not enjoying it nearly as much now that they aren't included. More Poe drama, but just in my head this time.

Last time I went shopping I bought a bunch of different alternative "milks" to try, all the Silk brand: soy, almond, coconut and oat. So far I've tried the soy and the almond and I like them both. It's weird because I like the almond milk they use at Tim Horton's, but when I bought almond milk from Costco it just tasted like water, it had no flavor or texture to it and I hated it. I ended up donating almost two full cases of it to the food bank. :| But I really like the Silk almond milk so I guess just... steer clear of the Costco stuff? It's just strange because usually Kirkland brand is good. Oh well. Still have coconut and oat to go. Also the oat/coconut "festive nog" is AMAZING and tastes SO CLOSE TO REAL EGGNOG OMG YOU GO SILK.

Only three episodes of The Walking Dead to go and I will have powered my way through the entire series with only one or two movie breaks for sanity. I think I've enjoyed Negan's character arc the most out of everyone's, but Daryl and Gabriel's were really good too. Quality writing all around.

Today I was supposed to do some baking, but I don't know if that will happen or not, considering I didn't sleep last night. I'm hoping to just pass out soon and sleep the afternoon away. I guess if I just can't sleep at all today either I might as well bake, though. *shrug* We'll see.

Current Mood: tired
Current Music: N/A: "The Walking Dead" on Riptide

FIRST OFF, I just fed Kaida a live worm for the first and possibly last time. It WIGGLED and BLED and then the PIECES WIGGLED WHILE THEY BLED and I felt SO, INCREDIBLY BAD oh my God. Like even digging it out of the soil was terrible I have never dug for earthworms before and then it was kind of cute?? And I CUT APART AN ANIMAL WHILE IT WAS STILL ALIVE. I FEEL LIKE SUCH A HORRIBLE PERSON.

But like... maybe I'll just get used to it, maybe it'll get EASIER?? If not, my 'lotls can survive perfectly fine on just axolotl pellets and frozen bloodworm treats, so I mean. That might be a thing that happens with my bunch. Just. The worm thing was not a great experience for me, right off the bat. :|

UPDATE: Kaida didn't even eat his worm bits. Goddammit. Right. So maybe I'll just #freetheworms and stick with pellets from now on. Or, at least until Kaida and friends are big enough to eat the worms whole, you know?

...anyway. Other than that. Um.

Even though I didn't write anything yesterday because reasons, I did do my writing this morning and so I'm still a day ahead in NaNo maths. I'm hoping to get some more written tonight, too, after I make dinner and feed the cats, before I go to bed. Hopefully another couple thousand words or so. Right now I'm at 35 pages and 16,119 words, which isn't nothing, considering I spent like three years dicking around with TKA and not actually writing anything until I got onto the ADHD meds.

Plus it's nice to be accomplishing something for the NaNo for the first time, since I always seem to have a block when it comes to November and writing my fffffffreaking NaNo project. I don't think I'll FINISH TKA this month, because I'm aiming for 80,000 words for it, but I can at least get to the 50,000 word NaNo goal, right? Right.

I have Teeth open to work on as well, but I'm actually more focused on TKA (for once) the last couple days, since I finished Nightingale. But then again, maybe I'm just not feeling Teeth at the moment and I should try writing one of the other 50,000,000 POST-SS ONE-SHOTS I have going on atm. Maybe Kindling or The Desert Tide, or even What Angels Dream? I dunno. I'll think on it I guess.

Tonight is my turn to cook dinner and I'm making shepherd's pie with tofu instead of ground beef (technically cottage pie, whatever) because I should be eating less red meat and that's a PROBLEM around here, especially hamburger. So I bought some tofu the other day and I'm going to do this tonight and see how it goes. Right now I'm pressing the tofu to get as much water out of it as possible before I start cooking at 5:30pm.

Mom is going in with an open mind, I think, but Lee is predictably skeptical because MEAT. Like at least one day a week when he cooks I'm going to get red meat, but that's better than before, when we ate it basically all the time. Mom is willing to switch to chicken/turkey and I'll cook with tofu and fish, too. REAL FISH NOT BATTERED AND FRIED FISH. Which. I might do next week, I have some salmon in the garage freezer. Mom doesn't like fish but she can deal once in a while.

I don't know, it's just like... I have all these new restrictions of my diet and I'm also trying to work around Mom and Lee. It's going to be difficult.

On a somewhat related note, yesterday I got my tea at Tim Horton's with almond milk and WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME ALMOND MILK IS SO GOOD? I would have gotten it FOR SURE instead of the Next Milk I have right now if I had known. Boo. (Next month, Sena, next month.)

Current Mood: contemplative
Current Music: N/A: "The Sacrament" on Tubi

Hello~ XD;

Alright, so yesterday Grandma came to pick me up around 10 in the morning and we drove up to Huntsville. On our way we stopped at the Super Walmart in Bracebridge (>3<) and I picked up a couple of odds-and-ends. Then in Huntsville, I had an appointment with a blood analyst/nutritionist that Grandma made for me.

But it was only like 11:30 and my appointment wasn't until 2:30. >>; So we went to the Salvation Army so Grandma could look for some picture frames, and then to the dollar store (where I also got a whole bunch of odds-and-ends), and then to the mall to kill time. At the mall I got a birthday card for Trunks even though his birthday isn't until October, lol. It was perfect! I'll just hold onto it until then. And in a cute knicknack store, Grandma bought me a windcatcher because I collect shiny dangly things and was like *.* when I saw it. <3

Then we finally got to the appointment. It was something Grandma was really wanting me to do, because apparently she saw the same guy and he really helped her with some ailments, and she's very concerned about me and all my health problems. The guy studies your live blood and then gives out homeopathic remedies based on problems he finds.

It was quite interesting to hear him talk, and when he took my blood (just a drop from my finger tip) he hooked the microscope up to a screen so I could see what he was talking about. But even though I found it interesting from an itellectual standpoint, I'm still... skeptical. He's telling me he can cure my bi-polar, asthma and allergies with homeopathic stuff, and I really don't see it happening. Still, it can't hurt to try, right? I dunno.

Ah, aside from giving me some pills and stuff to take, he put me on a restrictive diet though. -___-; No red meat, pork, wheat, milk, corn, sugar, caffeine, soy etc. Most of it I'm okay with, but the wheat and milk annoys me, because I can't afford to buy specialty foods to replace them. ><;

Anyway.

Then we came back to Grandma's place and here we are! I spent last night, and was supposed to go home today, but unfortunately the weather wasn't cooperating. >__>; I'm snowed in at Grandma's place. Whoot. (Yes I have my camera with me, I'll take pics of the snow tomorrow!)

Hopefully I can go home tomorrow, but for now I'm good and Sarah's feeding my kitties. :3

For RP-peoples, I can check my email and reply to comments and stuff, but I won't be on AIM until I get home. Sorry! Maddie write me your tag! lol. Love you guys! <3

Current Mood: amused

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Sena

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Sena's DW :: Watermelon Life

Stealthy and sinister on the inside.

Entries tagged with diet

Other Than Axolotl Flailings...

Little Things

And Another Thing(s)

Worms Yay Or Nay

Snow Snow Snow