senashenta: (Don't Test Keir)
I'm not going to the hospital after all. Dr. K is aaaaaall worried about the inflammation in my blood being related to my infection/abscess, but said infection/abscess is CLEARED UP, and I looked it up and inflammation in the blood can come from basically ANY condition, illness or infection.

I have long covid. I have arthritis. Both of these can show up as inflammation in the blood. I also have like every other condition in existence, so like??

I FEEL fine, or as fine as I ever feel, at least, and I have an appointment with Dr. K in a week and a half, anyway! I feel like nothing going on with me points toward my infection/abscess becoming systemic being very unlikely, and I'll survive until my appointment and we can discuss it then.

Mom is SO SUPER PISSED that I'm not going, but seriously FUCK THE ER THE INFECTION IS GONE WHY SHOULD I GO SIT THERE FOR 10 HOURS JUST TO BE TOLD I'M FINE AND TO GO HOME?? And like, she doesn't fucking know HALF of my medical problems, even though she thinks she does, so she has no idea.

I might call Dr. K tomorrow and try to actually get HER on the phone to talk about everything, too, just in case, but THAT is a big IF because she's notoriously hard to pin down.
senashenta: (Bare Your Teeth Against The Dark)
I got bloodwork done on Thursday afternoon and I guess it came back SUPER fast because my Doctor called me on Friday to tell me that I have EXTREMELY HIGH levels of inflammation in my blood, and she's worried it's related to my infection and abscess. She wants me to go back to the FREAKING hospital again just in case, and ask to see the on-call specialist when I do.

I assume she meant to go immediately, but I was NOT going on a Friday night or over the WEEKEND or Monday, those are the busiest days--so I'm going on Tuesday afternoon. (Statistically, Tuesday and Wednesday are the least busy days in ERs in Canada, apparently.)

Really, I'm not surprised, because the abscess still hasn't healed properly, but also like... I have longcovid and arthritis, and both of those would make the inflammation in my blood high as well, so I don't even know right now. Either way, I'm going back to the hospital to sit around for 10 hours as per Doctor's orders. I really fucking hate the ER, you have no idea. If it's such an emergency, why couldn't Dr. K book an appointment for me for Monday so I could just see her? It's fucking stupid. I'm so angry.

But also I know the abscess needs to be dealt with, even if Dr. K apparently doesn't want to do it herself, and I just... I HURT. I am in SO much physical pain it's unbelievable, and no one seems to be able to do anything about it. I'm probably looking at more invasive surgery for the abscess, but THAT WON'T ADDRESS THE ROOT CAUSE, so I still need to deal with that with a specialist, too.

And right now I REALLY need to get the axolotl tanks swapped out and stuff, but I physically can't do it at the moment and if I end up having to have more surgery it's going to have to be put off even more, which like. Fuck me. Basically I'm riddled with disease and it's ruining my entire life.

.....

And now I'm going to talk about something that doesn't make me angry and depressed!

1) Haku had a case of the zoomies today and was swimming all over the tank just generally looking like a happy axolotl. The 'lotls in general are doing much better, now that I've treated them for both the bacterial infection AND the fungal infection. They're just acting like normal 'lotls for the most part, starting to show their personalities again. I'm really relieved, I was so, so worried about them for a long time.

2) I worked a lot on writing Baby today. It's up to 33 pages and 15,233 words, and I still have lots to go. I also worked on Supply And Demand and Coyote Country a little.

I'm actually having a lot of fun writing Neave right now. Neave was an OC character I created and gave like one mention to in Storm Season, but she's become somewhat of a recurring character in the one-shots. Neave is basically an idealized version of me, so the me I wish I was/could be. Her last name is even the same as my middle name. I have a soft spot for her.

I had Comfort Food open on my desktop literally all day because I really need to edit it before next Thursday, but I think I GLANCED AT IT one whole time. I hate editing. =/

Oh, and last night I started working on Horse Sense, the sequel to Being Roach, you know, the The Witcher/Heralds Of Valdemar crossover that I wrote and posted way back in freaking 2021? Yeah, that one. Apparently the sequel IS, INDEED, going to happen! But it's going to be much longer than Being Roach's 13 pages. I'm aiming for around 40 pages, and crossing my fingers that it just doesn't turn into a chaptered monstrosity like some things have in the past few months (GO ADHD MEDS GO!)

3) I still photoblog every day on FB and Insta, but the last few days it's been more difficult because I can't get my Google Drive to load my new uploads/photos, so I have to post directly to FB from my phone, then save the pic to my computer so I can do the post on Insta because I fucking HAAAATE using Insta on my phone. I'm working the problem but like, I know .5% about Google Drive and have no idea what I'm doing. :|

4) I bought those scrapbooks two weeks ago and I still haven't done anything with them, but I'm hoping to change that soon. SOON.
senashenta: icon NOT up for grabs (Work On Your Damn Fic)
So, this infection business... I don't know. The abscess was HUGE and they drained it as much as they could in the ER and put me on heavy-duty antibiotics, but even WITH the antibiotics only about half of the abscess is healing and the rest is just sort of... in stasis. The pills are keeping it from getting worse for NOW but I'm really afraid that once I'm done them and the antibiotics are out of my system it'll just start getting worse again. =/

I guess the only thing I can do is wait and see because if I go to the hospital they're going to have me wait around for 10 hours and then just tell me to finish my course of antibiotics and come back if it gets worse. It's just really... I'm worried, and there's nothing I can do about it right now. If I could just get in to see Dr. K for a quick check-up that would potentially make me feel a lot better. idk.

Health woes aside...

Last night I watched a YouTube video about like... little-known horror movies, and now I have a little list of new (mostly old) movies to look for:

-Excision
-Big Bad Wolves
-Spring
-Antiviral
-Circle
-Killer Book Club
-Nobody Sleeps In The Woods Tonight
-Blood Widow
-Triangle

Admittedly, I HAVE watched Antiviral and Circle before, but it was a while ago and watching the little blips about them in the video last night made me think I should rewatch them. I know I liked Circle when I watched it, and I'm sure I at least DIDN'T MIND Antiviral because I watched it all the way through, but I don't really remember much of either of them, if I'm being honest. :P

So there's that.

This morning I wrote part of Comfort Food (the document is still open, I'm gonna work on it more later) and now I'm a little less than halfway finished it (give or take, depending on how long it ends up.) Once I'm done Comfort Food I'll get to work on Let's Make This Moment, which I still am... unsure. About the title of. Like, I sense a title change incoming, once I think of a better one.

Anyway, once I'm done both of these fics, then I have NO EXCUSE to keep procrastinating over Hunting Souls because it is LITERALLY THE NEXT FIC IN THE POST-STORM SEASON SERIES JFC SELF STOP IT ALREADY. >|

And I guess later today I'm thinking about working on one of my new scrapbooks for a while. They're both going to be simple to put together, just cut-and-paste jobs, but I have papers to go in them cluttering up EVERYWHERE right now and it NEEDS to get dealt with sooner rather than later. >>;

I can use the glue sticks I got FOR $1.25 AT THE DOLLAR STORE THANK YOU MICHAEL'S AND YOUR $14.99 GLUE STICKS.

Lifeline

Mar. 10th, 2025 11:33 am
senashenta: (Destiel)
I finished Afterglow last week, and finished Lifeline yesterday (though it still needs editing) and Lifeline came in at a MASSIVE 43 pages and 20,224 words. That is a TON for a one-shot! But I figure the word count might go up a bit when I start editing it, there are a couple parts that are bugging me. I'm hoping to get it edited by Thursday so I can post it then, and then Afterglow next week. Now I'm working on Comfort Food and Let's Make This Moment. Still not sure about Let's Make This Moment's title, that might change before I post it, whenever that is.

I need two new, bigger, white binders for Horror High and Storm Season. They've gotten completely out of control and the 2" binders that I've been using just aren't enough anymore. I need 3" ones. So, those are on my list for end-of-the-month shopping. At least I can get them cheap(ish) from Walmart. The orange binder I need for Endgame Girls is going to cost me $16 from Staples, which sucks.

.....

My infection is lingering despite the abscess being drained and the IV antibiotics AND the regular antibiotics I'm currently taking. I'm in a lot of pain. I might have to go to the hospital again, which fucking SUCKS. I hate the hospital, they're understaffed and overworked and when you go you end up spending two days there. ...that's an exaggeration (but not much of one.) I'm going to wait until I'm done my antibiotics and see where I'm at, and if it's still Not Good then I guess I have no choice but to go to the hospital, since getting in to see my actual Doctor is like pulling teeth. (I should be happy I even HAVE a family Doctor, really.) Anyway.

Today Mom and I are going to pick up a dresser in Barrie and I literally can't even afford it. I have $60 to my name and the dresser is $80 so I'm going to have to borrow more money from Mom. This month has just been a financial CLUSTERFUCK and there's nothing I can do about it. I HAVE to get a new dresser and I HAD to get a new aquarium and ODSP just doesn't allow for such things. They think $1200/month is enough to get by on, but it's not. But there's no point in getting into that again, it just makes me angry and gets me crying and I don't feel up to either of those things right now.

Now I'm going to go take a nap because I'm exhausted all the time right now and I need to be with it this afternoon when Mom and I go to get that dresser.

A Day

Mar. 7th, 2025 09:44 pm
senashenta: (Cas Looking Up)
Infection-wise, today was about the same as yesterday, though the swelling has gone down quite a bit since my ER visit, so that's good news at least. I'm still limping around and have trouble bending down, and I can't lift heavy stuff, but that will all come in time, or so I assume. I'm still bleeding a little from my incision site, but they had to leave it open so it could continue to drain, so I guess it is what it is.

Today Mom took me out to Michael's to buy a couple of scrapbooks. Up until now I've been using the same albums for photos and scrapbooking and it's getting really messy and cluttered. A lot of the problem is that I like to keep mini copies of the covers I make for all my fanfictions and original works, so the two scrapbooks I got today are going to be for those (one for fanfic covers and the other for original works covers) and then my photo albums can actually be PHOTO ALBUMS again.

Since we were there we went to Petsmart as well and bought a new 40 gallon tank for the axolotls. It was on sale so it only cost me about $140 or so, which is good. It's a breeder tank so it's a little longer and shorter than a regular aquarium, but it'll still be perfect for the 'lotls. The problem iiiiiis...

The girl I was supposed to be buying a dresser from on Monday messaged me to say that she and her hubby had decided to keep it after all. So, I don't have a dresser, which means I can't do the tank swap. =/

I guess it's not the WORST thing, though, because I have the leak in the current tank under control for now, and I'm still trying to treat it. I've dealt with the bacterial infection, I think, and tomorrow I have to somehow manage to do a 50% water change, and then a couple days after that I have to start treating for the FUNGAL infection. My 'lotls aren't happy right now, let's just put it that way. Poor 'lil guys.

Other than that...

Today I worked on Lifeline the SMALLEST POSSIBLE AMOUNT, and wrote a few pages of Comfort Food, and also very loosely conceptualized one more post-Horror High one-shot, currently (tentatively) titled Let's Make This Moment, because without it there would have been NINE post-Horror High one-shots and that made the OCD part of my brain unhappy because it wasn't a multiple of two or five. :D;;

I'm still figuring out the details for Let's Make This Moment, but at least having ten of these fics won't make my brain twitchy. Then I can hopefully let go of the post-Horror High one-shots and get back to work on the post-STORM SEASON one-shots like I'm supposed to be doing. :P

Anyway, the long and short of today is that I went out and ran errands and really probably shouldn't have because I'm still sick and now I'm in even more pain, but I got some important stuff done so I guess it was worth it. We'll see how I feel when I wake up tomorrow, though. Haha.
senashenta: (Albino Raven)
Last night things got bad enough with my infection that I had to go to the hospital and ended up needing minor surgery (VERY minor, they just used a local anaesthetic) to drain a HUGE abscess that had developed. They also gave me IV antibiotics (it took four tries for them to get a vein properly) and a prescription for different antibiotics that are "more targeted" than the AmoxiClav that I was already on. The doctor also said I should talk to Dr. K about me possibly having Hydradenitis Suppurahva (I think I'm spelling that right?), which she thinks could be the cause of all my problems.

Anyway, I was at the hospital for like six hours (right through dinner time, which sucked) and at 9:30pm when I finally got out of there, Mom picked me up and took me to Shoppers to fill my prescription, since it's the only pharmacy open late. While we were waiting for the pharmacist to fill it, I just limped around the store grabbing food (a sandwich, potato chips, a bottle of Fresca) so I wouldn't have to cook anything when we got home because YES, I was starving, but also in a lot of PAIN and TOTALLY EXHAUSTED. =/

I'm STILL totally exhausted TODAY, I just need a few days of doing nothing and just healing, which meant that when the girl Mom and I were supposed to be picking a DRESSER up from tonight messaged me this morning, concerned about the road conditions in their area for our driving, I HAPPILY rescheduled the pickup. Now we're going on Monday night instead. Honestly even if we HAD gone today idk if I would've been able to even LIFT the dresser to help get it in the car. :P

So, today I have done nothing much. I wrote some of Lifeline this morning, posted Pinfeathers to AO3 (I still need to post it AND Ghost In The Machine to Tumblr), and wrote a little three-page drabble from later on in the TKA series, when Wren gets her new Familiar after Renfield has been gone a while, an albino raven named Poe. It's a cute scene, I like how it turned out.

Speaking of scenes, [personal profile] cimberelly wrote me an N.D. scene and I adore her for it! I love that N.D. is still a thing after all this time, it's like... those characters just grabbed hold and wouldn't let go. The whole cast is amazing and I plan to write some N.D. scenes myself in the near future. <3

And then, of course, I put a new filter into the axolotl tank because the chemical filters don't do anything to filter out actual PARTICLES of stuff, and I needed one that DID. I had an external filter on the tank before but it leaked so I'm really hoping for the best this time.

Yesterday was the last day of the MelaFix regimen and the bacterial infection in the aquarium is pretty much cleaned up, so now I have to give it a couple of days and do a 50% water change before starting treatment for the FUNGAL infection that's ALSO going on. My poor 'lotls are suffering right now and I'm doing the best I can to get their tank back to snuff, but it's really hard to do because axolotls are so damned sensitive to chemicals. I've done SO MUCH RESEARCH to make sure the chemicals I'm using in their tank are safe for them but it's all still stressing them out. And all of this in a tank that's ACTIVELY LEAKING because I don't have a new tank/dresser yet. It's just... fuck. Not ideal.

And now I have to go FEED the 'lotls, so that's all for now.

More TMI

Mar. 4th, 2025 09:02 am
senashenta: (Medical Cross)
The antibiotics haven't kicked in yet and my infection was WAY worse when I woke up this morning, so I will probably be going to the hospital this afternoon to wait around for four hours and then be poked and prodded in sensitive bits by people in white coats. But I guess whatever it takes to get rid of this freaking infection. Like, at this point I can barely WALK, it is NOT a good time. =/
senashenta: (Medical Cross)
I have a serious infection right now, and it's kind of TMI, so I don't want to talk about it much aside to say it hurts an unbearable amount and I'm on antibiotics for it, but I'm only three doses in so they haven't kicked in yet. The last couple days have been increasingly bad, but today I spent most of the day feeling woozy and shaky and nauseous. I don't have a fever, though. Not yet, at least.

Anyway.

Today I went to the Denturist because I literally have NO molars left in my entire upper jaw, and she told me that if ODSP approves my claim, they'll cover them, except for the co-pay... which is $500. Because I just have $500 to spare. The bottom line is that even if ODSP approves my claim I STILL can't afford the dentures I need. So, today's appointment was kind of pointless in the grand scheme of things. How can ODSP give me just $1200 a month to live off of and then expect me to pay $500 on dentures? I don't get it.

.....

Tonight I nearly killed Alpine. He could still die, it's kind of up in the air. Basically, I was swapping around some of my plants in the hangers over my bed so that the ones that can thrive in shade were in the shadier spots and the ones that need more light were in the sunnier ones, and in the process of pulling Alpine out of his hanger his vines got caught in the macrame. Then my arm dropped a little and he completely uprooted. OOPS.

So I rescued his vines from the hanger and took him downstairs and repotted him and now I'm just kind of *fingers crossed* that he pulls through. I mean, he's a philodendron and they can next thing to survive a nuclear apocalypse, so I figure my chances are good. And if he DOESN'T survive... well, he's just a cutting off Bucky, and I still have Bucky, so... *shrug*

I repotted Castiel and my unnamed catnip that may or may not survive today as well, and that went much more successfully than moving Alpine did. They're going to keep living on the shelves downstairs where there's lots of sunlight for a couple of days to give them the best start in their new pots and then they're coming upstairs. Castiel is going in the hanger with Charlie until he's bigger and then eventually he's going in the aquarium next to Dean. Naturally.

Jack is doing really well since I moved him to the windowsill, I think I mentioned that before, but his growth is somewhat hampered by how cold it is there right now. Come spring and he'll start growing like a weed, though, and then I can put him in a proper pot, instead of one of the little plastic containers I use to start plants.

I have four plant hangers across my window now (which is going to make putting my A/C unit in interesting in the summer) and all together they hold seven plants. I wish I could hang more but I'm sadly out of space. :|

Mom thinks my plant hanger situation is GREAT btw.
senashenta: (Here Kitty Kitty)
Mnn. So I ended up going to the hospital today after all; at like 10 o'clock tonight because my hand was hurting so much. It's all swollen to shit, and the joints in my thumb are so stiff and sore that I can't bend it pretty much at all. The bite itself is getting pussy and infected already.

Loki has an icky mouth, I guess. -.-;;

Anyway, the doctor at the hospital gave me a prescription for antibiotics just like the last time, but by the time I left it was way to late to get it filled so I have to wait until tomorrow and just suffer through the omghand!agony. lol. It'll be damn good and infected by the time I get the first of the pills into me. ^_^; Eheh...

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