Updated Post-Storm Season Fic List

POST-STORM SEASON ONE-SHOTS:
1) When Lightning Strikes (complete, edited, posted) (demons/elemental)
2) Ghost In The Machine (complete, edited, posted) (poltergeist)
3) Pinfeathers (complete, edited, posted) (Cas moulting)
4) Teeth (complete, edited, posted) (tooth fairy)
5) Nightingale (complete, edited, posted) (succubus)
6) Going International (incomplete) (baobhan sith/each-uisge)
7) Hunting Souls (complete, needs editing) (Crowley/hellhounds)
8) Echoes (complete, needs editing) (spell gone wrong)
9) Endling (complete, needs editing) (original monster)
10) Supply And Demand (incomplete) (black market monster trade)
11) Fetters (complete, needs editing) (nightmare/demons)
12) Temper Tantrums (incomplete) (poltergeist)
13) Baby (incomplete) (spell gone wrong... sort of)
14) What Angels Dream (incomplete) (djinn)
15) Grace (incomplete) (phoenix)
16) Hollow Things (incomplete) (rabid werewolves)
17) The Desert Tide (incomplete) (kelpies)
18) Coyote Country (incomplete) (wendigo)
19) Coulrophobia (incomplete) (demon clown)
20) Creepy Crawlies (incomplete) (okumade)
21) Run Hide Die (incomplete) (hydra)
22) The Wolf (incomplete) (charnel cow)
23) Crawlspace (incomplete) (ghost)
24) Mirrors (incomplete) (basilisk)
25) Sudden Cardiac Arrest (incomplete) (humans, man)
26) Day Drinking (incomplete) (ghouls)
27) Mockingbird (incomplete) (wolpertinger)
28) Dreamcatcher (incomplete) (demon)
29) Magpies (incomplete) (original monster)
30) Dogman (incomplete) (dogman)
31) Stalactites (incomplete) (wyvern)
32) Fairy Tales (incomplete) (unicorn... sort of)
33) Eyes In The Dark (incomplete) (mothman)
34) The Thirteenth Child (incomplete)
35) Split (incomplete) (manananggal)
36) High Noon (incomplete) (chupacabras)
37) Animal (incomplete) (nandi bear)
38) Billabong (incomplete) (bunyip)
39) Tricks No Treats (incomplete) (coyote trickster)
40) Territoriality (incomplete) (unhcegila/Sally)
41) Epic Proportions (incomplete) (mishipeshu/thunderbird)
42) Daylight (incomplete) (gargoyle)
43) Slither (incomplete) (titanoboa)
44) Ripples (incomplete) (burrunjor)
45) Leave No Traces (incomplete) (keelut)
46) Runaway (incomplete) (amazons)
47) Bray Road (incomplete) (the beast of bray road)
48) Shearing Time (incomplete) (sheepsquatch)
49) Let Them In (incomplete) (BEK)
50) The Devil's Highway (incomplete) (Highway 666/elemental)
51) Through The Trees (incomplete) (pale crawlers)
52) Clowder (incomplete) (original monster)
53) Wayward Daughters (complete, edited) (spell gone awry... sort of)
54) Halcyon Days (complete, edited) (just Destiel)
55) Serendipity (complete, edited) (just Destiel)

Yep.

Life Stuff And Other Things

I should be working on Absolute Devotion, and I DID for a while this morning, until my hands started shaking and making typing very frustrating to say the least. I'm doing okay typing THIS because I'm going really, really slowly, but if I tried to work on Absolute Devotion at this pace I would drive myself batty. My creative brain works too fast for that. =/

So.

I guess what's happening is that Dad is just going to pay for a storage unit for me, but starting next spring just before my time limit runs out with Aunt Brenda and Uncle Alec because he doesn't see the point in PAYING for storage for almost a year when I could be getting it for free. (Also he just wants to dick around with Aunt Brenda and Uncle Alec because of how they've been treating me.)

Dad also says that hopefully I'll get a place through the subsidized housing people between now and then, and maybe the storage unit won't be necessary at all, but I'm not holding my breath on that one. I've been on the list for like 5 or 6 years now and when I emailed them a few months ago they wouldn't even tell me where I was on the list. So, yeah. Don't have real high hopes there. Which sucks because it means I'm fucking stuck here, but there's nothing I can do about it so I just have to suck it up.

Anyway.

Lois had her hip replacement surgery a couple of days ago and apparently everything is going really well so far. Dad took some time off work to take care of her/the house/the dogs but he says if it wasn't for the dogs he probably could have just kept going to work. As it is, Lois' grandson, Connor, is staying with them right now so he's supposed to be helping out as well, but apparently he's absolutely useless and all he does is eat things that aren't his to eat, get high, and bitch when they ask him to do something. I'm not surprised, though, his mother was always a useless twat too, so he probably gets it from her. The reason Connor is even staying with them right now is because this past winter his mother pissed away all her money and didn't bother paying the rent, so as soon as spring hit they were kicked out.

But they're doing alright, even dealing with Connor's bullshit, and Lois is healing up really well. I'm sure she'll be recovered in no time, and feeling better than she has in a LONG TIME. I think she still needs to have her other hip done as well, but I could be wrong? I should ask Dad about that next time I talk to him. I like to keep up-to-date on things like that, I love both him AND Lois will all my lil heart.

...

My feet/ankles/legs have been swelling up REALLY badly lately, particularly the right one. I've had to start wearing my compression socks again, but everything is so swollen the socks are actually causing BRUISING, at least to my right leg anyway. I wake up in the morning and everything feels okay, and I spend from 8am to around 11am or 11:30am sitting, working at my computer, mostly writing (except when I feed the cats at 9am) and things seem mostly fine, but as soon as I actually get UP, go and SHOWER and GET DRESSED? My legs start to swell. Some days are worse than others. Yesterday was a better one, the pain was less, but a couple of days ago I had a day where I could barely WALK. I need a Chi Energizer or a Dr. Ho's Circulation Booster or something like that, I think, but all those kinds of things cost HUNDREDS of dollars that I DO NOT HAVE. I'm going to talk to Dr. K about it at my upcoming appointment. She'll probably recommend exorcises I can't do because of my joints and supplements I can't afford because ODSP. Sigh.

In other news, my back is still fucked just because it's MY BACK, but my ribs are getting better bit-by-bit. They still hurt if I strain them or cough too hard, but it's a process. The other day, Mom mentioned wanting her cedar chest back, because right now the new tank for the axolotls is sitting on it (and has been for like over two months now) and told me I needed to work toward getting that done. And I'm kind of like. I have four broken bones in my chest PLUS whatever the fuck is going on with my legs, it's not as if I can just magically FIX those problems. I CAN'T lift and carry heavy things, so I CAN'T empty/bail the existing tank, I CAN'T swap the tanks out, and I CAN'T lift the buckets of water to FILL THE NEW TANK. I could do things like scrub the hides and swap out the filter cartridges and things like that, but water is SUPER HEAVY and so are the TANKS and I just... I don't know what she wants from me. I don't have Wolverine healing. Anyway, to placate her I said I'd at least get the support boards painted in the basement, but even that I can't do sitting on the floor and leaning over, so I'm going to have to cover the puzzle table with dropcloths and work from there, I guess. =/

The problem is... almost two years ago, Mom and I both got sick and then that illness (Covid) went to our lungs, causing pneumonia. While we both had pneumonia, Mom actually had it worse, and she broke 4 or 5 (I can't remember which) ribs, just coughing, the same as I just did last month. BUT. When SHE broke her ribs she didn't have any lingering PAIN from them. There was the pain of the initial break and then she was FUCKING FINE, with the exception that she couldn't sleep in certain positions. Dr. K told her at the time that this was REALLY UNUSUAL and that she was REALLY LUCKY. I was NOT that lucky. My ribs continue to ache and do the stabby pain thing when I twist wrong or bend over or try to lift things. But Mom doesn't have that kind of experience to compare it to, so she's getting impatient and I think she might think I'm faking it at this point, which sucks. And I just. I don't know what to do about the situation.

I guess I should just be happy that she's still helping me with the cat litters, at the very least.

The last time I saw Dr. K she got me to try a couple of new supplements, and one of them, Berberine, was to help with weight loss. Because it's an OTC supplement I don't expect results for a long time, but it's supposed to boost metabolism, I guess, and I HAVE noticed that I've been hungrier lately, which is... counter-productive to the weight loss goal. I've also been having trouble with my hands shaking like they are this morning, and I greatly fear that the Berberine is the cause, since I'm not on any other new drugs/supplements so it's really the only thing that could be causing it, either in itself or in a reaction with something else I'm currently on. So, I don't know. I'm going to give it a little longer and if my hands don't start evening out or start getting worse, I'm going to have to go off of it and see if THAT clears up the shaking. It's frustrating.

And there are like 5 other supplements that she wants me to be on as well, for my lungs mostly, that I'm just NOT ON because I priced them out and I CAN'T AFFORD THEM. They are all OTC stuff and ODSP doesn't COVER or ALLOW FOR OTC STUFF. I already spend probably $250/month on meds from Costco and the Walmart pharmacy just to keep me going, and that is a HUGE chunk out of my monthly allowance. The Berberine alone costs $30/bottle, so I'm like... fine. My weight is so out of control I don't even recognize myself anymore, so I'll eat the cost of the Berberine in the FAINT hope that it'll help. But I can't afford the rest. Sorry, Dr. K.

Other than that... I watched Final Destination: Bloodlines once on Saturday and then again yesterday (because I got distracted by other things during the last half hour of the movie on my first watch-through) and I actually really liked it. I think it fits in really well with the other FD movies and the kills were solid and creative. My only big complaint was how long the opening "premonition" was, it was MUCH longer than the premonitions in any of the other movies, or at least it seemed to be. I literally kept checking the clock on my computer when it dragged on because I was starting to lose patience. >>;;

ALSO NEW HTTYD MOVIE NEXT MONTH HELL YEAH!! <33

Le Sigh...

I guess...

I crave companionship, and I'm not getting it around here. Mom and Lee are sick of me, so I just stay in my room most of the time to avoid arguments and awkwardness. I wish I still had rl friends, but I've given up on that years ago.

So, I try to find companionship online, I try to make friends on BlueSky and here on DW, and over on AO3. I should probably pick up Tumblr again, I used to have a lot of fun there and a lot of friends there, too, but I almost feel like I've outgrown Tumblr and moved on. I could give it a shot, though, I suppose. *shrug*

I keep the loneliness at bay by sinking entirely into my writing and watching shitty movies on Tubi. It's better than nothing.

Even my writing fails me sometimes, though. I submitted a short Valdemar story to Mercedes Lackey like three or four years ago and I was excited about it, proud of it, but I've never heard back from either her, her husband or her publishers with feedback or anything. It would have been nice to be acknowledged, you know?

I miss being in a relationship, but I'm not SUITED for relationships unless they're long distance, and I've even killed some long distance friendships in the past. Not on purpose, it just always seems to HAPPEN.

C and I were in a long distance relationship for eight years, though, before we broke up amicably, so it IS possible for me to keep things going, if the circumstances are right. C and I are still friends, even now. There's hope.

But in general, I think I've just... somehow become the kind of person that others can't deal with and don't want in their lives. There's just something wrong with me, deep down inside, but I can't figure out what it is so I can work towards change...

I'm... broken. And that's not okay.